if u are a girl, what would you rather be?

a) sweet
b) sexy
c) hot
d) cute
e) posh
f) vogue

i choose sweet, hot and posh. hahaha.

i couldnt sleep last nite. tossed and turned in the bed for sooooo long.. wanted to sleep so badly but somehow i just coulnt! it really sucked. plus, i was all alone. sigh. when i eventually slept, i couldnt wake up!

Had a CCA briefing at 930.. but i woke up at 8!! left home at 9!! so yeah.. obviously i was gonna be late. contemplated to go or not to go. eventually decided to be good and go. despite being VERY late. and guess what. when i was just about to reach the lecture theatre, my frens smsed me "hey, it just ended.." *faints*

what the!!! i should have just stayed at home and sleep!!!! went allllll the way to boon lay... for nothing!! so silly and what a waste of time! oh well.. guess i deserve it! tts what i get for being late! moral of the story: SLEEP! argh.

having tuition later.. i am feeling super duper lazy to go. argh.

i really dun like him staying in hall. it sucks.

waited and waiting. but it seems that you arent getting it.

ytd shopping spree was real fun! but i still wana shop some more!!! haha..

managed to get:
1) four tops
2) 1 dress
3) 2 long necklaces
4) 1 mini skirt
5) a flower pin

thanks pipi for being a wonderful shopping partner ytd! we haven go to MANY shopping spots tho! haha... *hinting*

went to khai's bro's wedding.. heh.. khai.. when ur turn lak? and xuefen.. how...u want my baju kurungs for the future weddingssss?? i can give u a few pieces if u want! hehe.

euni has really up-ed my desire to go melbourne. hehe. seriously, i have been wanting to go there since last year! and the more i think of the apostles, the more i wana go and see them! haha. euni told me that she has a good fren over there who could bring us ard and possibly let us stay at her place too! so isnt that like bonus!! so girls, me and euni are SHIT SERIOUS about this. so lets save up and make this happen! please tell me and euni if u too are REAL serious abt it yah.

oh btw, my lovely cuzzin is back for 48 hrs!! supposed to fetch her but last minute there was some change of plans.. well cuzzy.. WELCOME HOME!!! hee.. this is the 'appetizer' before your 10-day holiday in ur hometown of singapore!!

ok dokiez.. need to go now.. cheacher gt to attend a talk tmr morning... *yawnz*..

good nite all.. mwah.

just came back from dinner with the tj peepz. gosh isnt it late! tsk tsk.

anyway it was good to see all of them.. aft so long.. heh cant believe most of the tj gals are in teaching. six of us altogether!! and naturally we ended up talking abt our students. sorry hafiz, amirul and nassar tt we gals were kinda in our own world. *sorry sorry*

i'm glad tt my frens are enthusiastic about the career path they have chosen. unlike me, they had other jobs prior to teaching. i kinda asked them abt how they feel abt the switch.. well, since teaching is my first job, i've always wondered how its like 'out there'.. so they shared some thots and feelings and i'm glad tt they feel happier now.. gals, lets hope tt this feeling stays with us and may the enthusiasm lives on!

hafiz.. thanks a lot for the drink yah!!

ooh i cant wait for my spree tmr!

it was an interesting match between the defending champs and the all time favourite. MJ vs VJ. last year MJ were the underdogs. and they took everyone by surprise when they defeated VJ. this year, VJ took back their tittle. i was so sad at the end of it all.

soccer is evil. MJ took the lead all the way for the first half. VJ drew it at the start of the second half. the atmosphere was tense. both schools had awesome supporters. close to ten mins before the game ends, my bro scored a beautiful goal which we all thought could possibly be the winning goal. i'm proud of u bro for scoring tt wonderful goal. a display of fine skills. so it was two for MJ and one for VJ. things heated up as VJ fot back. i salute the players for their determination. an MJ player was caught for handball and sent off the field. VJ was awarded a penalty kick. it was the scariest moment of the game!! BUT the goalie saved! and really everyone thot MJ would win. but but but.. the whole game took a turn after the send off. VJ seized every chance and scored THREE goals within injury time. 4 mins to whistle. three painful goals. final score: 4-2.
i wanted to cry. i really did.

but what amazes me was the spirit MJ had as a school. the school went on to cheer and never once did they give up. even after the final whistle, they were cheering so loud as tho they had won!!! i simply love the school spirit. it rocks big time.

sigh... thank goodness my bf doesnt play soccer. its fun to watch but its too scary at the same time. for someone as hyper as me, soccer only gives me 'high blood pressure'!!! but the game only goes to show tt determination counts to the very last minute and one person can make a difference. teamwork. team morale. team dynamics. it makes or breaks.

oh well.. its over.

oh guess what. haha. this i have to tell. BEFORE the match, a group of MJ girls who were sitting next to me asked me sum stuff.. here goes..:

MJ girls: erm excuse me, this game is btw siglap versus what school huh?
me: hong kah sec.
MJ girls: oh.. so u supporting who?
me: erm i am supporting meridien... for the game after this..
MJ girls: oooh.. u know someone from meridien?
me: yes.
MJ girls: erm.. u came to support that someone with ur entire family?
me: yes.
MJ girls: who is it? year 1 or year 2? arts or science?
me: year 2 arts.
MJ girls: *thinks hard* oooohhhh.... isit muhadher?
me: yes
MJ girls: *screamed and shrieked excitedly*.. oooohhh we are muhadher's fans too!!!
me: *smilez*

AFTER the game... while abt to enter the car... a group of MJ students came to me and my family..

MJ students: auntie!! are u all Muhadher's family?
my mum: yes we are..
MJ students: ohh... we are the Muhadher's fan club supporters!!!
my mum: *very surprised* oh.. thank u...
MJ students: auntie.. muhadher is really good... we love him..
my mum: heh.. but so sad MJ still lost..
MJ students: never mind.. in our hearts, Muhadher will always be our hero! he's really cool..
me: thanks guys.. thanks so much!!! *obviously awed*

OH MY GOD. like celebrity kan! wah.. i wonder what charm my bro has used on his schoolmates! tak leh angkatz seh peminat dier .. smangat tau all chase after me and my family!!! hahahaha.. wa caya sama lu lah brader..

it helps to have a great fren like u. thanks girl. u knw who u are.

oh wat an early lunch i had. supposed to go sofra with mum and dad but bcos of lack of time we had to postpone it. sigh.

ok i have decided. its watch. hehe.

its meridien versus victoria jc later at jalan besar stadium. i cant wait but kinda scared to watch the match. hehe. oik adik.. please score one goal at least.

the truth hurts. but i tried so hard to accept the truth. i eventually did. but sometimes it comes back to me. i wish i can build a bubble around me. to sieve wat i hear. cos i dun wana hear it anymore. i dun ask u wat i dun want u to ask me. ignorance is really bliss. just shut up. please.
stop glorifying.

i am in love with the lead singer of Pussycat dolls. she's so so so hot and yummy! gosh. she's like another jessica alba. these girls are blessed with a great figure and a beautiful face! best kan..

i seriously cant wait for the great singapore sale! i think its the most looked forward time of the year for the singaporean ladies and the most dreaded period for the guys! haha.. too bad for u guys.

would u rather buy perfume or a watch? haha. i'm contemplating. nad has influenced me to like Lancolm Miracle.

i cant wait for the July bonus. its like 2 months away but i already came up with a list of wants! haha * so kiasu *

why is it that women loves shopping? its such an expensive indulgence! boo kan. oh well.. we cant do without it!! haha.. its ok boyfriend.. as long as u take care of my needs, i'll take care of my wants. but of cos u can volunteer to settle my wants to if u wish to.. i wont say no k. hehe. promise promise. :)

three things made my day today:

1) one of my tuition kids got A1 for maths! second highest in class!! he's so happy abt it. so am i.
2) one of my bio kids said to me "love you" .. * i love you too .. its a she anyway.. so dun worry *
3) one of my chem kids said to me " miss you as a chem teacher ".. so cute rite.. still must specify AS A CHEM TEACHER. in case i would 'misunderstand'!!

i had such a long day ytd. *TIRED*

started off with tuition at 9 am! had lunch with pipi's family at hyatt from 1 to 3 pm! food was great and everything went well!! yay!

me and the gals then chilled out at reny's place from 5 to 10 pm! so long rite.. bot so much food! ate and yakked and watched tv.. so slack! but it was all good. gave them their prezzies.. hope u gals like it k!

spore idol was so funny! watching it with the gurls was so fun!! i knw reny's favourite.. the one with the lip gloss!! haha.. and nad lovessss the nong nong ago..xuefen loves the kung fu master! syidah didnt show any favouritism. hehe. as for me.. i just had a good time laffing! haha.

i couldnt say no
and yet my presence creates unhappiness to some
sometimes i duno what did i do wrong
sometimes i wonder why must i try so hard just to impress


lying in bed
staring into the darkness
sleepy yet awake
glad yet upset

a pretty long list of my faults

a longer list of things to reflect on.

he doesnt like her talking about them.

he doesnt want her mentioning them.

so there she is

just by herself

with her them in herself.

no more them for him

just us for us

the heat really irritated the hell out of me just now. was all dressed up for my date with pipi but the heat just killed my mood. first i had to walk frm home to the mrt station. then frm dhoby gaut mrt to cathaty. pipi wanted to check out the new cathay sp we decided to watch davinci code there. well, the ever so popular movie was fully booked all the way till the 11pm show!! and we were there at 3! there was like the 4pm, 5pm, 6pm, 7pm shows and yet all was full house!! only left the front rows! no way i'm gona pay 9.50 for a front row seat! so that further irritated me.

so we decided to go bugis shaw. walked all the way there. in the hot sun! argh. could practically feel my melanin being massively produced by the second! * i am super duper easily tanned btw*

after the long walk, we reached shaw only to find a super long queue! and when we fnally reached the counter to buy tix, the guy told us " the aircon is kinda down. so u might feel a little warm in there" I almost wanted to cry when he said that. like hello!! u mean i walked all the way just to watch a movie in a warm theathre??? WTH.

but we bot the tix nevertheless. argh.

ok but thank god the show was good. mind-boggling. i haven read the book. thus i was pretty lost thruout the show. still am now. but good kinda lost.

pipi's dad personally invited me to have lunch with the family tmr at Hyatt hotel. for his 55th birthday. i'm honored really. immediately bot him a gift with pipi. hope he likes it.

i have no idea what to wear to the lunch buffet tmr and to sentosa too. my wardrobe is filled up with too many working clothes and lack of weekend clothes!

cant wait to chill with my gfs at sentosa tmr! mwah mwah mwah.

i wana feel the excitement once again.

the heat really irritated the hell out of me just now. was all dressed up for my date with pipi but the heat just killed my mood. first i had to walk frm home to the mrt station. then frm dhoby gaut mrt to cathaty. pipi wanted to check out the new cathay sp we decided to watch davinci code there. well, the ever so popular movie was fully booked all the way till the 11pm show!! and we were there at 3! there was like the 4pm, 5pm, 6pm, 7pm shows and yet all was full house!! only left the front rows! no way i'm gona pay 9.50 for a front row seat! so that further irritated me.

so we decided to go bugis shaw. walked all the way there. in the hot sun! argh. could practically feel my melanin being massively produced by the second! * i am super duper easily tanned btw*

after the long walk, we reached shaw only to find a super long queue! and when we fnally reached the counter to buy tix, the guy told us " the aircon is kinda down. so u might feel a little warm in there" I almost wanted to cry when he said that. like hello!! u mean i walked all the way just to watch a movie in a warm theathre??? WTH.

but we bot the tix nevertheless. argh.

ok but thank god the show was good. mind-boggling. i haven read the book. thus i was pretty lost thruout the show. still am now. but good kinda lost.

pipi's dad personally invited me to have lunch with the family tmr at Hyatt hotel. for his 55th birthday. i'm honored really. immediately bot him a gift with pipi. hope he likes it.

i have no idea what to wear to the lunch buffet tmr and to sentosa too. my wardrobe is filled up with too many working clothes and lack of weekend clothes!

cant wait to chill with my gfs at sentosa tmr! mwah mwah mwah.

i wana feel the excitement once again.

met a fren just now. he's getting married in dec..so i asked :

me: so how.. excited??
him: no..
me: why??
him: i'm more like stressed cos its costing me a bomb!!!
me: *shrugs*

and from there we started a whole discussion about how a wedding can cause a big big hole in the pockets!

seriously, the cost of weddings are getting ridiculously high these days! a sacred event seems more like a burden now!! a five digit sum for a one-day occasion. how bizarre is that. and theres still the honeymoon to think abt. and the house after that. sheesh. i'd rather spend my money on a superb honeymoon than a grand lavish wedding. unless of course i am so rich that i can 'throw' money away. no doubt grand weddings are beautiful.. but isit really worth all the money? after all, the wedding is only for a day.. the marriage is for a lifetime. so yeah. simple wedding would do for me. as long as i have my family and my beloved frens to share that precious moment with me.

my professor said yesterday "in singapore, once u take home 4K, u'd be very comfortable already... as you work, you will reach a point where the pay doesnt really matter anymore.. but its about whether u get happiness out of it..."

well, i certainly am not TAKING HOME 4K.. and i haven reached that point where PAY DOES NOT MATTER. of cos the pay is not everything, but it DOES matter BIG TIME. i'm like at the starting point of adulthood. i have a vision of what i wana be and what i wana achieve in five years down the road. so rite now, savings is my top main priority. i have a target to reach for myself by the end of this year. sticking to my financial plan faithfully. i hope and pray things would be smooth for me to achieve that goal.

but here's the weird relationship: the more u earn, the more you want.

khairun said its greed and its natural. well, isit really greed? if u were to look at it positively, its prolly the fact that nobody wants to be stagnant. everybody wants to keep moving on and stretch their potential to achieve greater heights. so let's say u are earning 3K at the age of 25... u wouldnt want to still be earning that much at the age of 30. even if u are earning more, u'd tend to compare with others.. only to find urself feeling worse.. then u start wondering if u are being ungrateful and not contented with ur life. is this why humans always complain? that life is never good enough?

its just like when u are in school. when u are failing, u aim to pass.. and when u pass, u feel that its not good enough and u want a distinction. and when u get the distinction, it becomes not good enuff again cos then u want to have the BEST distinction. u knw what i mean.

so when does it all end? theoretically, there exists a stage of contentment. apparently, not many people achieve it.

my new mantra: i cant compare apples with oranges.

yay! time for some picture updates!!

see thats my cousin shasha..with rima.. rima melati is so gorgeous lah.. her face is picture perfect

shasha with syed azmeer.. she was SUPER excited ok. i had to climb the pelamin to snap this. and she kept telling me to come closer! sheesh. btw.. notice how the bride has been purposedly left out of the pic?? hehe. shasha's idea. not mine!

shasha and elysha... oh look how big the adorable elysha has grown.. sha.. ely doesnt look too happy with u.. haha..and see how pretty my cousin is.. *jealous..hmpf*

and finally.. me and shasha!! getting so bored giving namecards to couples.. so we snapped snapped! ooh i like..

btw... please dun come and tell me i look thin in this pic cos firstly the angle has got ALOT to do with that k!

have u ever jogged at macritchie? if u have, have u ever actually appreciated the primary and secondary forest around you?

hahaha. i must be freaking u all out with all these scientific terms. so ecological. anyway, thats besides the point. i had a field trip to macritchie just now. it was simple yet interesting. its not so much abt the content that i have learnt from it..rather, its the realisation that some things in life are simply taken for granted. the beauty of nature right before our eyes.. yet almost invisible to many... and that includes me. when i say beauty, i dun just mean at the superficial level.. i'm talking about the micro level.. okok.. i think the prof kinda intrigued me just now and i'm carried away rite now so i shd better just stop. otherwise, my blog would end up becoming a bio website.
*gulps*

me and my nie buddies had a good meal at swensens aft the field trip. it was our post practicum feast! yay!

i miss him.

news update.

I have been posted to Compassvale Sec! i knw i knw.. its kinda out of my zone.. but thank god theres a direct bus from my place! so, 27 is gona be THE bus come June onwards. i dont know what to feel about my posting. its the same feeling when i got posted to PRCS. well.. since i have always believed that everything happens for a reason, i shall accept my posting with an open heart... so Compassvale... here i come!!

my kids were so sad when i broke the news that i'm not gg back. the things they said were really sweet and touched my heart. *mwah*

my first trilogy. i like. i love.

i'm helping out my aunt at the wedding exhibition. oh what a tiring job. stand all day! met a few friends... haiz.. so many trainee teachers are getting married this year. how come i'm not!! boo. *HINT HINT to that special someone* good thing shasha is also working at this exhibition. at least i have some good company!

my aunts kept saying that i'm skinny now and that i have lost A LOT of weight. and i am so FREAKING bothered by it. cos i hate being skinny. the word skinny means 35kg and my JC days. so if anyone says i'm skinny, the first thing i would ask myself is " do i look like i'm 35kg again?" and the second thing i'd ask myself is " u mean i am back to those JC days.. scrawny and haggard..??" argh.. its irritating me. AM I REALLY THAT THIN NOW?? i dun think so but how come they said it in such a way that it seems so??

my mum and bf completely disagree with my aunts. mum thinks i did lose weight....from bulky to just nice... so she sees no biggie in this. bf thinks i am slimmer but still as attractive. hahahaha. tell me which bf in this world does not think that his gf is attractive! but anyway, i trust my mum and bf more!

feeling kinda sleepy... missin pipi who is away rite now..

yesterday was my last day at PRCS. the last day of practicum. i bet all the trainee teachers are relieved and overjoyed that its over. but i'm sure that amidst all the happiness, there's a sadness that cant be denied.

One of the boys asked me... " cher..just answer me. bear or cow?" so i said "bear". and he smiled. after class he came up to me and passed me a bear-shaped handbag and then walked away super qucikly!!! i think he was really shy...! i was touched and amused at the same time! i couldnt even say a proper thank u!! and some of the gurls were really sweet.. they know i LOVE cheesecake cos i always talk abt cheesecake in class.. so they bought me one on my last day! they aplogised for not buying the coffee bean chigago cheesecake cos they said they didnt have enough money to buy and the collection time clashed with school! they actually wanted to buy the whole big round piece! gurls.. actually, one slice would be more than enough..!nevertheless, its the thot that matters! thanks for the cheescake! my whole family gets to enjoy it! hehe..

thank god i managed to see all my students before they left school. gave them their little goodies and carried out a survey on my teaching. heh. there were a couple of interesting comments from them.. for example:

Q: What is/are the strength/s of the teacher that she should keep with her?
A: Her shortness.. bcos she doesnt block the whiteboard..

Q: What are some of the things that the teacher should improve on?
A: Grow taller!

hehe.. so naughty rite! hmpf.. hey kids.. remember what i always say.. SMALL IS BEAUTIFUL. *rolls eyes*

i'm just glad that most of the feedback given was positive.. thank u my students.. i will definitely use your feedback to further improve myself! i hope and pray u peepz would do well for the exams.

my bio classes made a deal with me:
WHOLE CLASS DISTINCTION = pizza hut treat from Miss Fazleen.

so, after the paper, i asked them..
me : so how was the bio paper? should i start saving up for the pizza hut date?
class: never mind lah cher.. i think we can forget abt it already lah.. no pizza hut for us..

haiz.. now i am worried!

oh well.. its all over now.. had a great stay at PRCS. wonderful kids.. amazing CTs and friendly colleagues.. i'm sooooo gonna miss my kids..would you all miss me too? *better say yes ok*

today, i spent the whole day cleaning up my oh-so-dirty room. five hours to clear a 10-week mess! but now its clean and cosy and smells yum yum cos i'm burning the pink strawberry candles.. *big big smile*

my nose and ears are blocked. cant taste a nut! cant hear cant smell too!! maybe my body is just telling me that it's time to just rest and relax...and i will do just that!

i miss my nie mates! cant wait to meet them next week.. i bet everyone has loads of stories to share!!! i miss NIE. as my colleague once said "u'll be kissing the grounds of NIE once u go back there.." hehe. oh i so will!

when was the last time i actually get to go msn at this time of the day? hmm. feels like too long ago.

just now was my last lesson for practicum. i'm both sad and happy. the invigilation schedule did not include any of the trainess names...which means that we arent involved! and that means i wont have the chance to see my kids taking the bio and chem paper. sigh. good luck ok kids! dun disappoint me. dun disappoint urself. i feel super nervous that the kids are taking their exams.. gosh.. as tho i am the one taking it. hee.

the weekend was awesome! woohoo.. shopped with pipi on saturday.. window shopped with mum on sunday and spent the entire labour day with my darling gfs!

SATURDAY:
Pipi was such a great shopping partner... after so long of not playing this role, he 'came back' with lotsa strength, patience and enthusiasm thruout the whole shopping spree!! thanks dear!! we'll resume part II of the spree on one of these days k.. hehehe.. muahahaha *evil lafter*

SUNDAY:
Walked ard TM with my mum looking for something special. found it but could not decide if i shd have it. *still considering*

MONDAY:
me and my gfs had such a sweet and enjoyable time celebrating our one year anniversary of leaving school!! we went back to NUS just to relive the moments and took crazy shots! it was really fun and we felt like students all over again!! even sneaked into the library to take a picture! my flip flops made so much noise in the disturbingly silent library. oh guess who was there? REPOT! hahaha... Mr Reputation was still sitting at the same corner.. it was as tho things never changed since we left.

me and my gfs were supposed to go to sentosa.. but due to bad weather, we ended up at bugis. window shopped and ate yong tau fu. fa had the craving and spread it to me and nad and baya! but too bad baya had to leave.. and so sad euni syidah and khai couldnt join! reny gave us a ride back in her ever syiok mazda 3. xuefen.. are ur eyes blinking again? u would get ur blue mazda 3 one fine day k.

we took lotsa great pics.. would upload them once its ready! stay tuned.. hahahaha...

hey gurls.. i totally enjoyed myself and what a memorable one year anniversary!

TUESDAY:
Back to work! boo-ke-doo-doo.

feeling a bit sick these few days.. been slightly under the weather.. haiz..